Cook Whole Chicken in Air Fryer

I listened to a Radio Five report on the plight of children in Gaza as I drove home from another memorable Newcastle United victory.  It was heart rending and, I am sure, had the desired effect on the audience.  Only terrible people could do this to innocent children therefore Israelis are terrible people.  In the binary discussion that passes for political debate these days, that makes Israelis the oppressors and Palestinians the victims.  Slam dunk - argument closed.  Just like the BBC reporting on the riots in Dublin - far right extremists responsible for rioting - nothing to see here - move on please.

Such is the state of news media these days - only victims and oppressors and no shades between.  I despair so I shall tell you about my adventures in air frying instead.

I have owned a small Tefal air fryer for about a year and found it a very useful addition to the kitchen.  But it failed recently and was repaired under warranty.  Meantime, convinced by their many advantages, we decided to invest in a more sophisticated model.  We chose the Ninja Foodi Dual Zone AF300UK which seemed big enough and flexible enough for our needs.

Our first major operation was roast chicken for Sunday lunch.  Each of the two drawers is large enough to hold a small chicken.  I prepared the chicken simply by brushing lightly with olive oil and seasoning and stuffing the body cavity with a handful of fresh herbs from the garden.  I then placed the chicken upside down in Zone 1 so:

To cook, I set Zone 1 to "Roast" and 180 degrees for 55 minutes.  After 40 minutes I turned the chicken right side up, intending to give it the last 15 minutes to brown the breast.  However, it was already looking pretty well cooked, confirmed by the meat thermometer (essential), so I only let it stay in for another 10 minutes before removing:

The meat temperature was 83 plus so it was well done (for chicken) but, for appearance, I think I should have let it have slightly longer right side up to brown the breast.  The chicken then rested for 20 minutes before carving.

Meantime, in Zone 2, I prepared the roast potatoes.  I decided to boil the potatoes for 10 minutes to soften then drained in a colander, giving them a vigorous shake to damage the edges.  I then melted a teaspoon of beef dripping in the Zone 2 drawer with the non-stick crisper tray removed.  When the fat was hot I added the par-boiled potatoes and swirled round until the potatoes were coated in the fat.  I then removed the potatoes for a moment, re-inserted the crisper tray and placed the potatoes on top.  I then cooked the potatoes on "Air Fry" at 180 degrees for about 25 minutes.  You could time this operation to complete after the chicken had rested and was ready for carving.

The resting time for the chicken gave ample time to air fry the pigs in blankets and veal forcemeat stuffing balls ("Air Fry" at 180 for 15 minutes) and the whole meal came together at once (sprouts and red cabbage and apple done on the stove):

I do hope this is more useful than my opinions on politics, politicians and the BBC?

PS, if you try this at home, please do not take my timings as read and check your own cooking times to taste.

59 Years Ago Today

Fifty Nine years ago today, I saved my life ejecting from Jet Provost XR 664 in a Martin-Baker seat and descended to earth on an Irvin parachute, relatively, unscathed.  By remarkable coincidence I became 664th successful user of the Martin-Baker seat. 

Constant Companions at the Stephen Joseph Theatre

 

Mark Brown, who appears to be an occasional theatre critic for the Daily Telegraph, didn’t think much of Sir Alan Ayckbourn's new play, Constant Companions, at the Stephen Joseph Theatre Scarborough. Brown complains that the play adopts the comic tone of a Carry On film and that the humour is “old hat.” I took a different and much more favourable view. OK there was the usual helping of slapstick but this, particularly in the case of sex-starved Don, eager to assemble his mail order sex robot, was pure pathos. More often the triple plot was uncomfortably funny with some very good acting. The ending, typical of Ayckbourn, was a little rushed for me but still provoking. My advice: judge for yourself. We had a most enjoyable afternoon and, judging by the buzz from the audience as we left the theatre, Mark Brown seems to be somewhat out of step with the paying customers.

Grant Shapps - Secretary of State for Defence

 

A retired RAF Officer asked this morning, with just a little irony, where Grant Shapps sat compared to a notorious predecessor as Secretary of State for Defence, Gavin Williamson.  Shapps is often described as having, a “safe pair of hands,” or, translated, unlikely to embarrass No 10.  After all, his appointment has received a resounding endorsement from Boris Johnson.  Mushroom humbly sees the logic:  so long as he does not cause trouble over money, he will be howling success in cabinet and will be able to continue managing the scandalous decline of our military capability as well as the next (yes) man.  But, as I have said before: Rishi and those helping him lead the Conservative Party to oblivion may think that they can sweep defence and security under the carpet for now but they will regret it at the next election.  Nobody has a clear idea of how the war in Ukraine will ever end and what state the belligerent parties and their helpers will be in afterwards.  The possibility of Trump returning to Commander in Chief and insisting that Europeans actually pay for their defence against a potentially triumphant Putin could concentrate minds, even in Germany, let alone Whitehall.  

Flying Legends at Church Fenton

It was soaking wet but well worth the effort.  Thanks to all for organising and operating an excellent event.  Hope I have better luck with the weather next year.

BBC Spoof Drama - World on Fire

 

The BBC is currently excelling itself with the spoof wartime drama, “World on Fire.”  The plot is obvious:  bungling male white British colonialist racists v Nazis (no Germans).  Fortunately, there are several feisty females to keep the war on track.  It’s the sheer preposterousness that I find addictive.  For example, David, who I think is Jewish, is a fighter pilot.  David has been successful flying the all-weather day/night Spitcane with notable victories against Nazi bombers in cloud and at night.  Last night he was sent on a dangerous mission to fly through bad weather across the Channel and locate some troublesome Nazi guns by breaking cloud cover and plotting the resulting fire.  David, who maintains crystal clear radio communications with his controller, who he meticulously addresses as “Sir (this is very odd because elsewhere in the drama other ranks appear to address Officers as anything but Sir),” breaks cloud with pin-point accuracy and announces his position as over Northern France at coordinates 50 degrees North and 30 degrees West.  Some mistake surely?  Fifty North and 30 West is about halfway between Canada and Ireland in the middle of the Atlantic Ocean, or at least it was the last time I flew under Oceanic Air Traffic Control.  No matter, David finds his way safely home only to be sent on an even more dangerous mission.  This time he is not so lucky but he deserves his fate.  We see David in the spacious Spitcane cockpit wresting the cockpit canopy with both hands whilst trees appear ever closer a few feet below (tip from an old flying instructor – whatever else, always fly the aeroplane).  Rather than crash land, David appears to have parachuted to safety (perhaps he was influenced by a previous scrape in which he urged his colleague to, "eject, eject") – the canopy, apparently miraculously opening at ground level, just in time to save him.  Leaving his shredded silk festooned on a tree so that he can be easily located, David staggers off into shallow undergrowth and successfully evades capture by lots of incompetent Nazi soldiers.  So far that is, and I cannot wait for next week’s excitement.  Whatever will the army of BBC Equality Diversity and Inclusion consultants, sensitivity readers, and fact checkers come up with next?

Mushroom the King-Maker

 

It doesn’t seem to be apparent in UK yet but across Europe tired centrist governments are seeking the support of right wing (“far right” in BBC definition) populists to shore up their declining  support with their respective electorates. Friedrich Merz of the German CDU recently talked about a possible accommodation with the Alternative fur Deutschland (extreme right in BBC definition). I know it’s a long shot but in the unlikely event that the Conservatives win a hung parliament, there will probably have to be some accommodation by the established parties towards inconvenient populist viewpoints if a new government is to get off the drawing board. Expecting a crowded market place, all eager to cash in on king-making rewards,  Mushroom needs to set out his stall early.  His radical offering contains just a handful of simple principles. The manifesto rejects:

• Arbitrary net zero targets and deadlines
• Open borders
• Burgeoning political correctness

And stands for:

• Personal responsibility
• Effective military capability
• Low taxation and the presumption that we should pay for what we consume

All that is needed is a catchily familiar identification.  Alternative for United Kingdom or AFUK for short sounds good.  Meantime, I’ll sit back and wait for the phone to ring and I’ll let you know how I get on opening a bank account.

Selby & Ainsty By Election

 

We have a by election in our constituency, Selby & Ainsty, on Thursday 20 July.  This wholly unnecessary procedure is the result of the petulant resignation of the sitting Conservative MP, Nigel Adams.  Over the last week, I have received 3 phone calls from anxious Conservative canvassers asking my opinion, on a scale of 1 to 5 or 10, how I feel about various policies.  Presumably, the collective tactile exercise will be used to direct the election messaging.  Mushroom can save them the bother – here is what he and, I dare say, many wavering Conservatives in Selby & Ainsty think:

• I do not care about your various police initiatives.  All I want is for the Police to do their job, under existing laws, and catch criminals.  The fact that over 90% of burglaries are never solved is a disgrace in a civilised society which depends upon the rule of law.
• Immigration is out of control.  The Rwanda scheme is by no means perfect but it is all I see on the table at the moment.  If any of the hand wringers have a better idea then let them propose it or forever hold their peace
• I will not die in a ditch over the green belt – if we need development then, pragmatically, something has to give. But, if we must have development it is axiomatic that appropriate services to support the growing population are provided in parallel.  By the way, one sure fire way of reducing the need for housing development would be to get a grip on immigration, both legal and illegal.
• I think the response to various flood disasters has been satisfactory and I do not see why we should spend vast amounts of money protecting people who are silly enough to buy a house in a flood plain.  I object to paying extra premiums on my house insurance to cover people who are too dumb to do a reasonable amount of due diligence before buying.
• Of course we need more jobs but it is not the Government’s job to create them.  The Government should create the environment for business then get out of the way.
• You may think that you can sweep defence and security under the carpet for now but you will regret it at the next election.  Nobody has a clear idea of how the war in Ukraine will ever end and what state the belligerent parties and their helpers will be in afterwards.  The possibility of Trump returning to Commander in Chief and insisting that Europeans actually pay for their defence could concentrate minds, even in Germany.  Best you persuade Wallace to change his mind.

Meantime, I have received a large volume of, largely, uninformative literature from the plethora of other candidates.  I have to say, however, that I was particularly struck by ex Conservative, Sue Anderson Brown, who wails about the plight of her hard-working daughters (two teachers and a nurse) who are struggling to make ends meet.  She thinks getting rid of the Conservatives will solve their difficulty.  Mushroom has a couple of more immediate practical suggestions to alleviate their respective crises.  Firstly, why not take a part time job on all your sick days – nobody would ever know and you should be able to offer a regular commitment.  Secondly, why not retire early on your unique defined benefit pension?  I hope that is helpful Sue?

BBC Internal Watchdog Unfit for Purpose - Shock Revelation

 

Readers may remember Mushroom’s, ultimately, fruitless battle with the BBC which ended with an OFCOM ruling in 2018.  The essence of my complaint was that the BBC, through their reporter Kamal Ahmed had deliberately manipulated data to support an editorial line that UK would be much worse off out of the EU.  I escalated my complaint to OFCOM because I considered that the BBC News at Ten report on 14 Feb 18 was inaccurate, biased and misleading and the BBC, through their complaints process, had not addressed my concerns satisfactorily.  I wrote at the time that, “in rejecting my submission Ofcom pointed out that their duty under the Communications Act 2003 was to ensure that broadcasters are “duly” impartial and “duly” accurate.  In my case, Ofcom found that the BBC had been duly accurate, not unduly biased and not unduly misleading.

Ofcom said that “due” means adequate or appropriate to the subject and nature of the programme and that “due impartiality” does not therefore mean “an equal division of time has to be given to every view, or that every argument and every facet of every argument has to be represented. 

 So, it seems to me, the BBC may construct a programme in which Brexit is in the dock.  However, the evidence for the prosecution need only be “duly” accurate.  Worse, the evidence for the defence need not be heard in full since the subject and nature of the programme is Brexit in the dock; the test of “due impartiality” providing generous cover for how facts are selected and represented.  In sum, it seems to me, if the programme content is roughly (duly) consistent with the editorial line, then anything passes the Ofcom test!  Like Captain Yossarian, I am tempted to let out a respectful whistle and exclaim, “that’s some catch.”  And like Doc Daneeka, you might agree, “it’s the best there is?”

 It came as little comfort, but no surprise, that the “BBC internal Watchdog” has been dismissed as unfit for purpose after upholding a mere 25 complaints of bias in the last 5 years.  During this time the BBC would have received over 1.7 million complains of which, statistically, over 600,000 would have been complaints about bias.  It was considered inconceivable that all but 25 of theses complaints were either considered to be without merit or were dealt wilt informally to the satisfaction of the complainant. Quite so!

 As for Ahmed, in a dose of the curse of Mushroom, he was made redundant by the BBC in 2021.  According to Wikipedia, he now heads a digital news company that aims to counter misinformation.

 

Commons Defence Committee

 I have just been catching up on the proceedings of the Commons Defence Committee, yesterday, 1 February 2023.  Trigger warning, this is an excruciating experience, particularly for Air Force veterans.  However, in true Staff College tradition, I am pleased to summarise the evidence of the star witness, Air Chief Marshal Sir Mike Wigston, Chief of the Air Staff, as follows:

Sleep tight tonight, your Air Farce is awoke.

Looking back on my accident investigation experience it would be tempting to blame the Chief for the situation.  However, the root cause is surely the half-wit who appointed him in the first place?